Parenting Mindset

It’s Only Breastfeeding People?!: Thoughts From An IBCLC.

It's only breastfeeding people. A woman unable to breastfeed.
I'm Jen

I'm an IBCLC, Pediatric Sleep Coach & Postpartum Doula helping families navigate the wild ride of the early parenting years.

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Middle Road Musings

Monthly(ish) Newsletter


We’re moving into the season that’s all about food and seeing that my work is supporting the earliest of human feeding, I thought it fitting to reflect on all that goes into feeding our families. When I was in my lactation consultant program, my instructor had two phrases that she often repeated. These weren’t gentle reminders. They were brazen, loud, and adamant spoken from the mouth of a seasoned lactation consultant with grit. 

1). “You did the best that you could with the information and resources that you had at that time.”

2). “It’s only breastfeeding people.” 

Why I love these:

I love both of these because they take into account all of the gray that is inherent in early parenting. “You did/are doing the best that you can with what you know/have”. If you had more information and resources, you may have done things differently with birth, feeding, sleep, and parenting. You can’t be further along than you are but as you experience more, you will build upon the wisdom that you gain along the way. 

“It’s only breastfeeding people” isn’t meant to discount the amazing benefits of human milk but to put into context that there are hundreds of things in life that are best-practice that we don’t achieve on a daily basis. If body-feeding happens for you with ease, what a gift. If it happens with great effort, that’s amazing. If it happens with continued suffering and angst or isn’t able to happen, thank goodness there are alternatives. How you feed your baby is one aspect of your life it is not the ONLY aspect and is not the most important aspect if it’s not happening for you. 

For Body-Feeding Families:

You and your body are able to feed your baby human milk. What an achievement, what a fierce, beautiful, righteous thing to be able to do for yourself and your baby!! 

For Formula-Feeding Families:

You and your body are not able (or choose not) to feed your baby human milk for physical, mental, or emotional reasons. What an achievement to pivot, what a fierce, beautiful, righteous thing to be able to accept for yourself and your baby!! 

You Alone Get To Choose:

Love and connection are the basis of your relationship with your child and you alone get to choose the heart of what that means for you. This is a journey, this is a journey, this is a journey, not a destination. 

If you need support figuring out what this means for YOU, you can book a lactation or sleep consultation, sign up for Middle Road Musings to get a monthly dose of TLC in your inbox or follow me on Instagram.

Until Next Time,



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Thoughts from a San Francisco Lactation & Sleep Consultant.

IBCLC, Doula, Sleep Maven & Creator of the Middle road hub®.

Hi, I'm Jen.
Evidence-Based Practitioner & Heart Centered Human.

Learn more about jen 

I'm an International Board-Certified Lactation Consultant, Pediatric Sleep Coach & Postpartum Doula helping families navigate early parenting through exploring the MIDDLE ROAD-that place that lies somewhere between LOSING YOUR MIND and the greatest experience of your life!